I’ve been in kind of a slump lately, not really into doing much. You’d think that I’d be at a party every other day what with all this new found freedom, but lately I just haven’t had the urge. It’s a phase, one that I go through every couple years. As depressing as I’ve become lately I have to admit there only 2 things that have me worried.
One: My friends, I’ve been alienating them a bit lately and thier starting to take it personal. They shouldn’t, Ive completely isolated myself from my entire family too. And Two: This guy, (lol I know, its always some guy right?) he’s not like any other guy. He’s something like the guy of my dreams to be exact, special. I’ve literally had a crush on him since I was four. Just a few months ago we were “reunited” at a party but it seems like ever since I’ve been giving him the run around. First, i was because I was in a relationship, but every time he’s made plans to see me since then Ive kind of avoided him. I’m certain that I’m fucking up, COMPLETELY fucking up.
I have the chance to be with a someone who’s exactly everything I want in a guy, he adores me, my family approves and he is the one guy I’ve met so far in my 18 years living that totally gets me and he’s not a wimpy geek weirdo. A guy who GETS ME! Not a guy who tolerates me or just accepts the weird shit I’m into, but TOTALLY GETS ME??? I guess I’m notorious for dating/being attracted to the “jock” types, lets just say I’d be getting a 2 for 1 deal. Things are a bit rough for me right now though, and I’m afraid that when this is over and I’m all shiny and new again the opportunity would have stopped knocking. But hey how many girls are reunited with their childhood crush right? Maybe lucks on my side this time. :)
